Showing posts with label living. Show all posts
Showing posts with label living. Show all posts

Monday, October 29, 2012

Loverly...

So I up and left this adopted city of mine some ten days ago because all in all it was just getting too much. The sea beckoned to me from a land not-so-far-away and immediately I packed my bags for the sunny, dry terrain that whispered my name. I got there on a Friday and lay low. I love surprises... unless I'm the one surprised... and so on Saturday morning I invited myself to a breakfast planned by friends and surprised mine. He didn't squeal in delight or trip over furniture but I know he was excited to see me and screaming with joy on the inside :P After enjoying delicious wholeweat pancakes drizzled with caramel, sprinkled with banana scallops and garnished with cream at N'eco's we drove around town happy just to be together.


Time had been going by at an insane rate - especially the last few months. I feel like I've just barely adjusted to October and already November has crept up to take it's place. This makes me super excited, for now, not only am I counting down the days on Monday for the weekends but I'm also counting down the months to summer, because this summer is going to be mine :) Any way, I digress, the reason I was talking about time whizzing by was because the nine days that I got in my port city seemed to really slow down so that every moment was enjoyed and every memory etched into our minds forever. My friends, my people, they make my life so special. A certain someone (my bestie) was missing, and had she been there, things would've been even more fun, but she's off pursuing her dreams at one of the world's top colleges so she is forgiven!


In the meanwhile I enjoyed spending time with family, being lazy, lying on the couch, watching tv, gossiping with my grandmother about various family members and family scandals. I lay on my tummy and contemplated life, laughed at meaningless, silly, things and made cupcakes with my little cousin. I watched Taken 2 at the cinema with friends and shared popcorn with mine while bugging him with my slushie as the other friends threw popcorn at me, giggled and whispered! We did dinners and lunches, enjoyed serenity and peace, made headway, talked about things serious and not-so-serious and generally had a jolly good time.



When the time came, yesterday, to say goodbye to my lovely city and my friends and family the grumpiness in me came out to rear it's head. I didn't want to leave, I wanted to stay on, but alas all good things must come to an end. And as I flew 35,000 feet in the air I realised that this wasn't such a bad thing. For moving forth is good... as November will pass leading us into December I have a feeling that we're going to have a good winter. I'm already planning a wicked new years here for which both family and friends will be heading on over to the land of fog and crisp winters, Lahore. A dress and dancing shoes are in order... after that I'm all set to party! Oh and a shiny disco ball! 



Saturday, October 6, 2012

Faking It

So I hate having to do things that I don't want to just because that's what someone else wants and I'm afraid to disappoint them or piss them off or hurt their feelings. Yet I do it. Time and time again. Sometimes I eventually end up being grateful that I did, but every so often it leaves me upset and resentful. Ergo I end up pretending to be something I'm not for someone else's sake because I feel that doing what I want is selfish. Is that ok? The line is blurry... when should you live for others and when is it acceptable to stand your ground to do what you want and be genuinely happy rather than faking it? When is it alright to disappoint someone and make a choice they don't agree with because you'll be happier? When should you go with what someone else wants and sacrifice your own feelings? When does your opinion matter less?


I am struggling with these thoughts today. There's so many things in my life I gave up on because it's not what someone else wanted and/or because it wasn't a decision the people that mattered supported and on days like today I find myself looking back, missing those times, wishing I had fought a little bit harder for what I wanted, what I believed in. But then again, if I had I wouldn't be where I am today and for the most part, I'm happy, or at least content, with my life. Still I can't help but think back and carry that regret of not taking the opportunities that I let slide me by. But those were my decisions, that unfortunately I let other people influence, and now I have to deal with the consequences and try and move forward without looking back and learn to let my past go, fake it till i make it.


Friday, September 21, 2012

Quotes of the Day!

Today I'm all about people living in peace and harmony - well I'm like that everyday...but today more so because what I see around me is making me want to gouge my eyes out... I can't believe these people, or their mentality. They are making me increasingly angry. So I have shut the TV off... and decided the only good I can do is try and spread love and peace and bring some semblance of happiness to this world.

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